Lawrence Jay Switzer media on instagram
@lawrencejayswitzer
  • 46 likes ||
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  • 1 days ago

From a fiction-writing W.I.P Challenge #WIPLinebyline ... Submission 14 out 31 for July . ~~~ See all posts for SAYVILLE TALES here: #sayvilletales ~~~ To preview or purchase SAYVILLE TALES, use link in my PROFILE. ~~~ Or search your favorite online booksellers. . Other hashtags: #hell #devil #fictionbooks #shortstories #waltwhitman #writingcommunity #novelwrites #novelists #reading #readabook #read #humor #bookstagram #writersofinstagramcommunity #chaucer #loveshortstories #storiesonstories #excerptsofstories #kindlebooks #WIPLinebyline

Lawrence Jay Switzer media on instagram
@lawrencejayswitzer
  • 44 likes ||
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  • 3 days ago

From SAYVILLE TALES, a novel of travelers' tales... The unexpected and unexplainable confluence of unicorns and donkeys and foxes and hounds and bakers and owls and spiders and mice and tulips and tapestries and bagels and vampires and donuts and loan-sharks and losers and a whole wide world of what-not, what-for, and whatever, the little glimpses of the sheer fecundity of happenstance’s possibilities, mingled with the glorious and deplorable parade of lives and life—in itself resembling a roll of vividly imagined wallpaper imprinted with a design that never repeated itself, not even once—had suddenly out-spooled itself to a rough-edged end... . . ~~~ See all posts for SAYVILLE TALES here: #sayvilletales ~~~ To preview or purchase SAYVILLE TALES, use link in my PROFILE. ~~~ Or search your favorite online booksellers. . Other hashtags: #hell #devil #fictionbooks #shortstories #waltwhitman #writingcommunity #novelwrites #novelists #reading #readabook #read #humor #bookstagram #writersofinstagramcommunity #chaucer #loveshortstories #storiesonstories #excerptsofstories #kindlebooks

Lawrence Jay Switzer media on instagram
@lawrencejayswitzer
  • 64 likes ||
  • 3 comments ||
  • 5 days ago

SAYVILLE TALES is being sold at Book Culture on Columbus Avenue, NYC as of 4:00 pm today. Need an ice pack to counter any possible head-swelling that may occur before morning. See all posts for SAYVILLE TALES here: #sayvilletales To preview or purchase SAYVILLE TALES, use link in my PROFILE. . Other hashtags: #hell #devil #fictionbooks #shortstories #waltwhitman #writingcommunity #novelwrites #novelists #reading #readabook #read #humor #bookstagram #writersofinstagramcommunity #chaucer #loveshortstories #storiesonstories #excerptsofstories #kindlebooks

Lawrence Jay Switzer media on instagram
@lawrencejayswitzer
  • 54 likes ||
  • 2 comments ||
  • 6 days ago

Review from The International Review of Books . With his tongue firmly in his cheek, (I hope) Lawrence Jay Switzer takes readers on a train journey where interesting characters tell tales of life, the afterlife, death, nuns, unicorns, the mystery of bagels, the brown fox and See Spot Run. He spares no one, not Donald Trump, the Pope, the Devil, history, or, for that matter, Mormons, Jews, the Irish, Christians, Steven Spielberg and rainbow bagels. The Rabbi can't explain rainbow bagels and urges you to write to the Pope directly...address supplied. No need for a stamp. . I've sniggered my way through Hell, the train ride, beautifully illustrated, and stories told with such ironic wit, it was almost like watching an American version of a Monty Python show with pot. . Nothing is sacred here, American history is told with pictures and conspiracy theories that will blow your mind. . Take your time with this book. The Devil is around all the time, so be careful when you are offered temptations - he loves red apples... In the words of the author, a small excerpt: "Well, to me, it’s obvious,” the Professor explained with a shrug. “What should be obvious to you, though—for your own good—is that not everything is what it seems to be or says it is.” . Savour these alternative tales of wit, wisdom, bad choices and a smooth train ride to Sayville. Linger in Hell to have your picture taken but get out before your bad past catches up with you. Spot isn't running anymore, and he knows exactly who stopped him... . ~~~ See all posts for SAYVILLE TALES here: #sayvilletales ~~~ To preview or purchase SAYVILLE TALES, use link in my PROFILE. ~~~ Or search your favorite online booksellers. . Other hashtags: #hell #devil #fictionbooks #shortstories #waltwhitman #writingcommunity #novelwrites #novelists #reading #readabook #read #humor #bookstagram #writersofinstagramcommunity #chaucer #loveshortstories #storiesonstories #excerptsofstories #kindlebooks #WIPLinebyline

Lawrence Jay Switzer media on instagram
@lawrencejayswitzer
  • 54 likes ||
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  • 8 days ago

From a fiction-writing W.I.P Challenge #WIPLinebyline . The boopity-boopity-booopity-boop tune of First Call, the racetrack gambler’s national anthem, galvanized the the old geezers in the Off-Track Betting office. Up on the television, the horses, now bearing colorful, pint-sized jockeys, could be viewed as they were led to their assigned partitions in the starting gate. . “Too bad they had a fucking beer commercial just when the horses paraded the paddock,” a voice said, cutting through the reverential silence. “Whenever I’m at the track, that’s the first place I look. I only bet on a horse if I see it taking a big, healthy dump in the paddock." . “What kind of screwy system is that?” . “The horse that shits biggest and shits last is always lighter. Anyway, mind your own fucking business, loser.” . Overhearing that, the Devil thought, "Well, that clears up the mystery of how a certain somebody won his election: a massive bowel movement—in full view of the public—right before the national starting gate opened for polling." . ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Submission 7 out 31 for July . ~~~ See all posts for SAYVILLE TALES here: #sayvilletales ~~~ To preview or purchase SAYVILLE TALES, use link in my PROFILE. ~~~ Or search your favorite online booksellers. . Other hashtags: #hell #devil #fictionbooks #shortstories #waltwhitman #writingcommunity #novelwrites #novelists #reading #readabook #read #humor #bookstagram #writersofinstagramcommunity #chaucer #loveshortstories #storiesonstories #excerptsofstories #kindlebooks #WIPLinebyline

Lawrence Jay Switzer media on instagram
@lawrencejayswitzer
  • 46 likes ||
  • 0 comments ||
  • 9 days ago

From a fiction writing W.I.P Challenge #WIPLinebyline . The letter writer, whether or not he really was The Devil incarnate, proclaimed to be innocent of any wrongdoing in Fresnel Park, and he went on to confess that his mother, Mrs. Devil—as she was mockingly christened by reporters, although christened is an unfortunate way to describe anything connected with this notorious family—had forbidden him to enter Fresnel Park alone.He confessed to the newspaper's editor that he had been paying scant attention to his mother's warnings and handwringing for many a millennium gone by. The last time he clearly remembered heeding his mother's advice about anything was when she detained him from rushing outdoors to witness the Great Flood, insisting that he take an umbrella with him. The umbrella did him no good since it splintered after suffering two days of the punishing deluge. Worsening matters, he detailed in his missive to the newspaper, he wasn't wearing galoshes, having forgotten them during the distracting argument about the umbrella. Sloshing about in rainwater for forty days and forty nights led to such an advanced case of foot fungus that no amount of walking on hot coals could burn it away. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Submission 5 out 31 for July . ~~~ See all posts for SAYVILLE TALES here: #sayvilletales ~~~ To preview or purchase SAYVILLE TALES, use link in my PROFILE. ~~~ Or search your favorite online booksellers. . Other hashtags: #hell #devil #fictionbooks #shortstories #waltwhitman #writingcommunity #novelwrites #novelists #reading #readabook #read #humor #bookstagram #writersofinstagramcommunity #chaucer #loveshortstories #storiesonstories #excerptsofstories #kindlebooks #WIPLinebyline

Lawrence Jay Switzer media on instagram
@lawrencejayswitzer
  • 93 likes ||
  • 0 comments ||
  • 12 days ago

From a fiction writing W.I.P Challenge #WIPLinebyline . Years had passed since the Crumble Goods Bakery closed, ending the glorious days of cookies and cream and screaming kids with milk mustaches. Most of the raisins on the you-are-entering-Crumbleton billboard had flaked off and blown away to who-knows-where, and the remnants of the painted oatmeal cookie, nibbled at by the biting winds of successive Wisconsin winters, looked less like a cookie and more like a bowl of porridge or something worse. The town’s population had gradually shrunk back to its original, pre-bakery dimensions. There were 203 souls remaining with 406 out-turned pants pockets between them, and these days the town's principal product was hangover vomit; the only thing you could smell baking was meatloaf, and that was only on Sunday nights. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Submission 3 out 31 for July . ~~~ See all posts for SAYVILLE TALES here: #sayvilletales ~~~ To preview or purchase SAYVILLE TALES, use link in my PROFILE. ~~~ Or search your favorite online booksellers. . Other hashtags: #hell #devil #fictionbooks #shortstories #waltwhitman #writingcommunity #novelwrites #novelists #reading #readabook #read #humor #bookstagram #writersofinstagramcommunity #chaucer #loveshortstories #storiesonstories #excerptsofstories #kindlebooks #WIPLinebyline

Lawrence Jay Switzer media on instagram
@lawrencejayswitzer
  • 32 likes ||
  • 1 comments ||
  • 14 days ago

From BEACON CITY / Chapter 1 /Challenge #WIPLinebyLine . Naturally, with all the roentgens of radiation released by the mid-century atomic bomb tests in the desert, and the many families displaced by them that subsequently relocated to Beacon City, there were frequent genetic mutations in the years to come, the best example of which was the woman the children in the Shadowtown district had dubbed “Mrs. Potatohead,” for her vaguely off-kilter features --slightly mismatched nostril shapes, eyebrow elevations, ear cauliflowering, and so forth; this poor woman was so riddled with Picassoesque variations (some only a matter of centimeters in scope), the cumulative effect was such that if you had cocktails with her, you needed to have a second cocktail to forget all the weird things you had noticed while drinking the first one. . Submission 1 out of 31 for July . ~~~ See all posts for SAYVILLE TALES here: #sayvilletales ~~~ To preview or purchase SAYVILLE TALES, use link in my PROFILE. ~~~ Or search your favorite online booksellers. . Other hashtags: #hell #devil #fictionbooks #shortstories #waltwhitman #writingcommunity #novelwrites #novelists #reading #readabook #read #humor #bookstagram #writersofinstagramcommunity #chaucer #loveshortstories #storiesonstories #excerptsofstories #kindlebooks #WIPLinebyline

Lawrence Jay Switzer media on instagram
@lawrencejayswitzer
  • 25 likes ||
  • 0 comments ||
  • 16 days ago

~~~ See all posts for SAYVILLE TALES here: #sayvilletales ~~~ To preview or purchase SAYVILLE TALES, use link in my PROFILE. ~~~ Or search your favorite online booksellers. . Other hashtags: #hell #devil #fictionbooks #shortstories #waltwhitman #writingcommunity #novelwrites #novelists #reading #readabook #read #humor #bookstagram #writersofinstagramcommunity #chaucer #loveshortstories #storiesonstories #excerptsofstories #kindlebooks

Lawrence Jay Switzer media on instagram
@lawrencejayswitzer
  • 11 likes ||
  • 0 comments ||
  • 16 days ago

Above, an excerpt from Sayville Tales === As a punishment for breach of contract the Devil had Senator McCarthy jailed (what he actually said, mockingly, was “en-Carthy-rated”) at the Sartre Motel (rated at minus three stars), locked in a cheesy, roach-infested room with Josef Stalin and Patricia Highsmith as roommates, and there the trio remains, frothing at the mouths like rabid dogs, perpetually short a fourth for a distracting game of bridge or mahjong. The seedy Sarte address was notorious for its nausea-inducing wallpaper, see-through drapes, and shag rugs, in addition to its award-winning hospitality torture, worse than the most disreputable dump in Sodom or Gomorrah. .Requiescat in pace, thought the Devil sardonically, as he cracked the waste-pipe of their toilet, ripped out their phone, pocketed the remote control for the television, and swallowed their room key. . “If he wants that key,” the Devil told Lilith in bed that night, “he can send his lackey, Roy Cohn, to go scrounge around for it in my shit.” . ~~~ See all posts for SAYVILLE TALES here: #sayvilletales ~~~ To preview or purchase SAYVILLE TALES, use link in my PROFILE. ~~~ Or search your favorite online booksellers. . Other hashtags: #hell #devil #fictionbooks #shortstories #waltwhitman #writingcommunity #novelwrites #novelists #reading #readabook #read #humor #bookstagram #writersofinstagramcommunity #chaucer #loveshortstories #storiesonstories #excerptsofstories #kindlebooks

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